Here’s a lesson I learned while my life was falling apart. I had been abandoned after driving my family away. I drank and drank and partied and fought. I was arrested time and time again, and that’s who I was.
I had been drinking and decided to go to the bowling alley to drink and meet my cousin. I had walked a couple of miles to get there, while carrying a Wal-mart sack full of beers I was drinking.
When I got to the bowling alley I hid the sack of beers behind a bush, alongside the building and went in to drink.
By the time my cousin showed up, I was fairly drunk and had introduced myself to all the ladies in the bar, and their boyfriends were not happy.
So, I was being good for a while, until I just couldn’t handle it anymore, and decided to ask one of the ladies to dance or have sex, I don’t remember which. Anyway, I was asked to leave.
Well, actually 3 guys and the bartender led me to the door while my cousin went to get the car. As I was leaving I turned and said some things that caused them to come outside and get tough.
I walked over to my stash of beers in the doubled Wal-mart sack, and picked it up. At that time, one of the guys started mouthing off and charged me. So, I cracked him in the head with the sack of beers. It split his wig, and sent him tumbling.
The other guys came charging, and I jumped into my cousin’s car that had pulled up at that time. We took off, and went to drink some more.
This was not a rare occurrence. I was fighting all the time. But, this occurrence was something that led me to feel that things had to change. Mostly because I thought the cops would be coming to get me because the guy I hit had to go to the hospital and get stitches.
I hid out for a while, till I was offered a chance to go to Springfield, Illinois, and do some construction work. I honestly thought this would be a chance for me to start over. That God was giving me a chance to change my life, which I wanted to do. I thought a change of scenery would help me.
But, I immediately fell back into my old ways of drinking, chasing women, fighting, and getting arrested. This led me to understand, that a change of location or situation does not solve our problems, because one of our biggest problems goes with us. Ourselves. I was the problem.
Changing our location or situation can help, but we need deep spiritual changes, and an overwhelming desire to be free of what controls us. God did provide a chance for me to move, and to see that moving won’t change me. Only He can change me. Turning to Him, is the only way we can experience the real deep changes needed. We need a Healer.
God is ready to work on us, when we ask Him.
(Photograph: Capitol building in Springfield, Illinois)